So they say...

An erection doesn't count as "Personal Growth"

I say...
"Yes it does"

If you didn't already know...

From sources unkown, but I post anyway...

We've all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition for each is listed below ....

GUTS - is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask: "Are you still cleaning, or are you flying off somewhere?"

BALLS - is coming home late after a night out with the guys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass, and having the balls to say: "You're next!"

Hopefully this clears up any confusion on the subject.

What the shit is this?!

I was bred and raised in a place where snow is not an issue to be dealt with but once in a blue moon, if that, and even then there might be a quarter to a half-inch at most lightly spread about the flora and fauna. So, one more time for the peanut gallery, what the shit is this?! Since my job does not allow nor have room for sick days or, apparently, SNOW days, here I be; and by the skin of my teeth to boot.

It took what is normally a five minute drive at most and turned it into a 45 minute trek against seemingly insurmountable odds at risk to not so much my life, but certainly to that of my beloved war-horse of a pick-up to make it in.
Let me clarify one thing here: though truly beloved to be sure, by warhorse I mean only that I have really just beat the crap out of it and have never had to take it in for anything other than regular maintenance or for something that I did to it. A ’97 Ford Ranger, that I bought in early ’98, just doesn’t have what it takes to forge through a foot plus of snow or, God help it, up a frickin’ hill (which it can barely do without the snow, God love it). And, AND, it’s in or below the single digits! That’s below freezing folks! Again, what the shit is this? Enough about that.

This will be my final winter in no-mans land though thank you very much. Soon it will be back to the valley and sunny days and mild winters will be enjoyed all around.

For those who can appreciate this...

From sources unkown, but I post anyway...

Marines are always taught, among other things:

1) Keep your priorities in order

and

2) Know when to act without hesitation.

A United States Marine was attending some college courses between assignments. He had recently completed missions in Iraq and Afghanistan.

One of the courses had a professor who was an avowed atheist and a member of the ACLU. One day he shocked the class when he came in, looked to the ceiling, and flatly stated, "God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you exactly 15 minutes." The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop. Ten minutes went by and the professor proclaimed, "Here I am God. I'm still waiting."

It got down to the last couple of minutes when the Marine got out of his chair, went up to the professor, and cold-cocked him; knocking him off the platform. The professor was out cold. The Martine went back to his seat and sat there, silently. The other students were shocked and stunned and sat there looking on in silence.

The professor eventually came to, noticeably shaken, looked at the Marine and asked, "What the hell is the matter with you? Why did you do that?"

The Marine calmly replied,

"God was too busy today protecting America's soldiers who are protecting your right to say stupid shit and act like an asshole.
So He sent me."